The Village - Idiot Pt. 1

If I was to write about my experience with fundamentalist Christianity and how I survived it, it would have to be a book as large as the Bible itself. Same size font and everything. Coming out of it by steadfastly following my intuition finally freed me of it's stranglehold. Established fundamentalist Christianity is a black hole of ignorance and superstition. It's interpretation of the world primarily constituted of tidbits from the Old and New Testament and hearsay that supposedly supports it's Bible inspired theories. Let me be clear here: I am not writing about the correctness of the Bible or it's message. I am writing about it's self-proclaimed messenger's and how their interpretation unwittingly, negatively influences their subscribers. As I slowly became more objective and less judgmental, I finally realized what kind of delusion I was a victim of. Joining the military amplified the transition to normal sentience. The contrast between their heroes in the New Testament and the lives of their supposed "descendants" or "keepers of the faith" is stark. There are a lot of good people in their midst. Striving for an honest living and seeking a community that will help preserve the integrity of their character, they constitute the majority of the church. But these people are intentionally allowed to be used as smoke screen for more sociopathic characters. These type commit the more grievous sin of deception and delusion. They resemble the archetypical Pharisee's, guilty of self-righteousness and not averse to dabbling in intrigue to preserve their interpretation of the faith. Many are aware of the greater secular world and it's mechanics, but fear that this enlightenment will soil the innocence of the original soul. Souls they mistakenly interpret as theirs to keep. They will draw parallels with Eve and the fruit of good and evil. The flock must be protected and as self-appointed shepherds they will do so at any cost. Little do they know what peril they put their "flock" in when they intentionally keep their members in ignorance. Not only do they distrust modern medicine, they do not recognize psychology as a medical science, probably the grievous of the two policies. Without the light of many discoveries in psychology for the past 100 years, many psychological diseases go undiagnosed by a licensed psychologist. Even some who do dissent from their ranks, do not effectively escape the influences of their long exposure. Certain diseases that come to the forefront are depression, sociopathy, schizophrenia, and suicidal ideation. Undiagnosed, many victims are put at dire risk of personal injury and death as well as harming others. Not a doctor myself, but I do come from a medical background. I am a Registered Medical Assistant in Virginia and received my medical training through the U.S. Navy. In my professional experience, not only have I dealt with patients with such afflictions, I also realized I have personally experienced them myself. Although I have never been diagnosed with depression or suicidal ideation, I will admit now that I have had both of these diseases. I am in the process of getting them treated. 

The phenomena has been addressed before. The possibility of the remnants of an ancient ethos surviving into modern times. The popular movie The Village is a great example of what I am trying to portray. M. Night Shyamalan is a perceptive writer and talented director and he couldn't have illustrated that world any better. Now I, who have "escaped" the Village, am writing to the world to make the ordinary rational man aware of the dangerous issues that lie within it's walls. Fortunately, I have come out relatively unscathed and have integrated quite well with the accepted establishment. Unfortunately, not all have been so lucky as I. Now, I do recognize that worldview and subsequently lifestyle changes like mine are not atypical. Before nation building became the game of the elite, history has shown that most primitive men came from this background (reference the movie 10,000 A.D.) Inventing the wheel was the first breakthrough for modern man. I also recognize that there are still masses of people who still have yet to "invent the wheel", but this is my story. A story that will hopefully help others successfully escape this labyrinth they call the Village and successfully integrate with the "City." Hopefully, my story will help you the "citizen" reader more easily spot the struggling dissenter and be more inclined to help him along the way.

P.S. I originally planned to write a book about this "Village" phenomena in our society, and have converted it into a series article. I will post more about my fundamentalist upbringing and my transition. 

Schizophrenia and Controlled Human Studies

Feelings of depression and frustration can be the result of too much stress, perceived or real, mixed with a lack of appreciation for the positive affects of stress, even if its a blip of obtuseness from a subject who otherwise is known for their objective outlook on life.

Feelings of synthetic elation and exuberance or even hubris can be indicators of a lack of reasonable amounts of stress (self-imposed or instructed) and again obtuseness. These feelings can be magnified if the individual has a long history of mood swings, as the subject may justify riding self-inflated importance to an unhealthy degree with the rational that it is reasonable compensation for all the times of depressed feelings. 

The underlying issue with both feelings is not that they are unstable, but the unhealthy infatuation with feeling in general. The subject's concentration is apportioned on the effects stress has on his gauging mechanisms of subjective feeling and not on the verifiably positive results stress can have on any individual, i.e. running releases endorphins and improves cardiovascular health, puzzles exercise real-life problem solving abilities, etc.

On a tangent:

I have no qualms about using myself as a subject in my own controlled or uncontrolled experiments and observations. I get to choose my battles and I rather pick my own brain than allow others to do it for me. In addition, I don't believe humans should be subjected to the same tests and experiments that insentient animals are. Allowing ignorance to continue to hinder the development of intelligence for any reason is a travesty to human evolution as a sentient species and reminiscent of the aloof attitude of the Nazi's towards the rest of non-Aryan humanity. I think it violates the highest code of human ethics, which, in case one has forgotten is to treat all people equally; Even if nature has not physically created them biologically equivalent. Nature may reveal many facts and truths, but is far from the ultimate example of ethics.

Dangerous Rhetoric and Degrees of Hate

Personal analysis of the Tucson shooter:

Jared Loughner did not associate himself with a popular political or ideological group and with good reason. With the little resource provided by the media and personal study of psychology I have formed an interpretation of the motive behind the random targets in the shootings and his psychological affliction. After exploring the Democratic side before 2007 (accepting to a degree their liberal views that appealed to his sympathies for a better community like combating illiteracy) Mr. Loughner decided to meet with a Democrat in hopes of affirming the direction he had chosen. (Note: in high school, many students are still finding a community to associate themselves with.) According to a high school peer of his, the meeting with Rep. Gifford was more than disappointing. In my opinion, Rep. Gifford did not take her citizen's interest in politics seriously and may have given answers to his questions not thoroughly thought out. Mr. Loughner being in the infant stages of becoming a liberal took the brush off answers as a personal affront. He seems to be the type who's ego bruises very easily, especially a youngster with a weak self-image. This event caused not only a great deal of pain but in his naivete may have caused him to take another extreme. At this stage in a young man's maturity development, very little intellectual convincing is needed to lead him in a certain political or ideological direction. The military confirmed Mr. Loughner tried to join the armed forces in 2008. Officially, he was denied admittance due to his recreational use of marijuana. Feeling rejected now by both communities, Mr. Loughner felt he had no alternative but to keep his thoughts and motivations to himself and may have spurred him to find like-mindedness in books. Among the usual list of books found even in your personal library, Mr. Loughner owned copies of Mein Kampf and The Communist Manifesto. There his still intact intellectual ego may have found fraternity and solace in the angry ramblings of other often misunderstood persons like himself. For more than two years, the now severely mentally ill student ostracized himself from his peers and community, developing no source of feedback and constructive criticism from friends, and losing touch with any peers he had relationships with in the past. Any attempt at reaching out or even a sub-conscience cry for help during this period was largely misunderstood or ignored by his family or community ill-equipped and generally unqualified to interpret such signs. My theory is these negative experiences from his attempts to belong caused him to form a misanthropist view of the world. In that case, it didn't matter who Jared Loughner shot in his murderous rage because everyone who was perceived to belong to a group was considered an enemy.

P.S. I realize I'm a little late on this, but I never considered publishing any views until today.